God Eater Online and 4 other games with online in their name that need to go mobile

By , on September 14, 2016
Last modified 8 years, 2 months ago

So God Eater Online is coming to mobile. That's kinda cool news, although looking at the UI on the screenshots that have been released there's a good chance you're going to have grow a couple of new fingers to get the whole thing working.

Which got me thinking, what other games with the word online in their title do I want to see on mobile? Because I mean that's a pretty logical jump to make given the circumstances. Stop judging me, I do what I want.

Anyway, here's a list of games that I thought of. They're in no particular order, they're not on the list for any particular reason, and quite frankly if you wanted to challenge some of my choices I'd probably be on your side of the argument.

Phantasy Star Online

I was always going to start with this one. It's a classic of the Dreamcast era, one of the first MMOs I remember playing, and it had cool space warriors in it.

I mean, sure, it was a bit simple, but just being able to play online with your friends at the time was pretty darn amazing.

And I can't imagine it'd be that difficult a port. Mainly because I have no idea how to port a game so most of my imagination on the subject involves copying and pasting. Pretty sure that's how it works.

The Matrix Online

Wow, remember when we all thought The Matrix was the height of cool? That was an impressive couple of weeks. We all bought slide cases and nose-clip glasses and jumped around a bit.

Anyway, there was a terrible MMO based in The Matrix universe, so why not port that to iOS? It was old and clunky when it came out, so one can only hazard a guess about how terrible it must be now.

But on the plus side, swooshy coats and dual gun play. And hopefully nothing from the last two movies because quite frankly they were awful.

Metal Gear Online

I've never played Metal Gear Online, but I hope to all heaven there aren't as many cut scenes as there are in the main games in the series. That'd be rubbish.

I'm not talking about the new one anyway, I'm talking about the old one. What iOS really needs right now is more ports of old games.

Plus I'm pretty sure you can hide in boxes in it, and there aren't enough games that let me hide in boxes. I don't want to hide for sneaky or violent reasons, I just want to make sure I'm never seen again.

The Sims Online

I am scraping the barrel here. Like really digging my fingernails into the gunk at the bottom to find out what's down there. And what have I found? The Sims Online.

Because obviously what The Sims really needs is people being able to watch all the awful things you do to your digital charges in the name of experimentation and sadism. That'll make it funnier.

I really don't care if this game comes out on iOS. I just put it here to try and get a cheap laugh and quite frankly the whole thing got dark and depressing far too quickly. I'm sorry. I'm stopping now.