It's too hot. Honestly, my brain isn't working. I live in a greenhouse. All I can think about is how hot it is. The answer to that is it is very hot. Hot hot hot. There is heat everywhere and I am incapable of escaping it.
This may well be why I've gone ahead and written a piece of content about the best hot games on the App Store. Sure, it might not make much sense, but if you expected anything I did in this heat to make sense then you just don't know me at all.
Click on the emboldened names of the games below to download them. And if you can think of other hot games, then put them in the hot comments so we can have a hot debate. It really is very hot.
It's got fire in its name. Fire is the hottest thing in the world. Apart from my flat. My flat is hotter than fire. This is a smart casual RPG with a lick of lovely Nintendo polish. Although the polish is probably melting in the heat.
Read the Pocket Gamer review here
It probably is hot enough right now that the entire galaxy could set on fire. It would not surprise me. That would make the title of this deep space shooter strangely prescient. We wouldn't have time to notice though because we'd be on fire as well. At least then I wouldn't have to open so many windows because I'd be dead.
Read the Pocket Gamer review here
A swipey slashy game that really pours on the pressure. But the pressure isn't lovely and cool like a glass of ice water. It's hot like my sofa. My sofa which I can't sit on because it's too hot. Maybe don't play this one in this weather, since you'll have to move your fingers quite a lot.
Read the Pocket Gamer review here
I'd like to play a real-life version of this snowball-balancing game, just so I could fail and fall into the comforting white arms of an icy grave. Oh for a moment of rest from this fearsome heat. This game is ace by the way. And it's by Nitrome. I love Nitrome.
Read the Pocket Gamer review here
Amazon Fire Tablet
I don't know what I'm doing any more. It's too hot. That's a tablet, not a game. I'm going to put my head under the cold tap and I'm not coming out until winter. Hot. Hot hot hot.